Premature

     A week from yesterday I wrote up all about my brother's final day with us prior to his mission. In a twist of events he came home much quicker than we anticipated. He flew in to Jacksonville last night, 7 days after leaving. He was released as a full-time missionary this afternoon back home in Douglas. I decided I would be frank about the situation, which I imagine people would be curious about, and hopefully save him from having to repeat over and over.
    The days since his departure have been the most challenging of his life. As soon as he boarded his first plane he said that a dark cloud of loneliness came over him. Then he met up with other missionaries for the second flight and he felt better. He got his dork dot (a symbol that he was a fresh new missionary) and met up with his companion for the next 12 days. In typical missionary style, he got put to work right away.
    The first early morning they immediately started to work on skill-sets for the mission field, including how to teach, the proper ways to do so, etc. As soon as this real training began he started to panic. He wasn't able to focus, he quit eating and daily functioning became difficult for him. He attended classes and couldn't even reply when it was his turn to speak. His feelings of lonesomeness was his biggest downfall. So he was sent to and fro, with his companion going along to the doctor's and so forth.  This caused Acey's companion to fall behind in their rigorous schedule (which truly wasn't fair to him). There are so many missionaries there that they aren't able to give too much individualized attention to a single elder, it's more of a quick training course for masses. The MTC called 5 days after he arrived to speak with my parents and said that something had to give. Acey was completely miserable and broke down when he talked on the phone to Mama and Daddy, everything just intensified. They really wanted him to stay, but the coordinator who was on the phone said that in his 5 years of being a worker in the MTC he had not seen a worse case of severe separation anxiety. He just didn't think he was ready yet. Acey was given an extra 2 days to really decide his own fate, where he steadily declined. His own health was at risk because of the aforementioned problems and it just became a medical issue as the days progressed. It became clear that, for the moment, he would not continue his mission. The MTC agreed that he would have to come home to first work on his anxiety before he would get sent into the mission field. So he flew back.
    I write this because it's hard for him, our family, our ward. It's extremely important to me to level with everyone in the hopes that he will continue to receive support and love. So many people pitched in to help him before he left and my family is exceptionally grateful for that. The MTC said, "his heart is in the right place" and we know that was true. He is a good young man with courage to try something that was scary for him but, for now, he has some things he needs to work on. We, of course, only hope that his future will be filled with the best. It's completely possible that he will go out at a later time when he feels more able to cope with all of the emotions that come with it- at this point it's just too early to tell. But despite any challenge or trial or emotion our family loves him to pieces. And it'll stay that way.